Blatant Snake Sex II: Revenge of the Screaming, Chunky White Chick

So for those of you who are on the edge of your seat concerning the snake orgy and the putting an end to thereof, I have little to nothing to report.
I was asked to remove myself from the sidewalk, preferably before the local preschool let out and parents started arriving to pick up their children thus forever sealing my fate as "crazy old Mrs. Williams". Now, people are saying that the snakes were a hallucination and my husband is certain that I have in fact lost my entire mind. They are saying these things because the stupid, horny little reptiles did not make an appearance today, at all. Seriously. I kept looking for them, at one point I contemplated trying to lure them out which brought me to the realization that I have no idea how to lure a snake. What does one do to LURE a snake? What makes them tick, what makes them smile, what makes them feel self-actualized and whole?
I most assuredly had one answer: BLATANT SUNNY SNAKE SEX. There was a moment when I contemplated a crime scene reconstruction that involved cooked spaghetti noodles, black paint, and fishing line. But that was way too much work and it was time for Cold Case Files...